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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25039708">ghost city tokyo</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacelamps/pseuds/spacelamps'>spacelamps</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>wake up from your dream, thief. [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Persona 5, Persona 5 Royal, Persona Series</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>(shocker its not), Angst, M/M, POV Akechi Goro, also i dont THINK archive warnings apply here if they do lmk, bc the man promised he would and he DOES, but uhhhh wasn't originally intended to be that, fuck if i know it's probably not!, hella royal spoilers lmfao, if you squint this can be implied as a romantic shuake, is there comfort? is this hurt/comfort?, it can be tho! like. the idiots think it's unrequited on both sides., not a shipfic but could be read that way, ryuji futaba and kinda sojiro have like. one speaking line each lmao, the most violent thing here is akechi slapping akira, this is SAD half the stuff i write is sad wow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 02:41:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,298</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25039708</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacelamps/pseuds/spacelamps</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"If you'd lost it too... Well, if that happened, I would have slapped you awake."</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He hasn’t heard from Joker since their last meeting on the 2nd—which, you know, wouldn’t be that concerning if it weren’t for the whole “the Phantom Thieves have until the 3rd to steal this treasure and if we don’t we’ll be trapped in this false reality forever” deal. He’s overreacting, surely. Surely.</p><p>Kurusu Akira is a stubborn-headed idiot. Goro hadn’t- <em>hasn’t</em> lost him yet.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Akechi Goro &amp; Amamiya Ren, Akechi Goro &amp; Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro &amp; Persona 5 Protagonist, Akechi Goro/Amamiya Ren, Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>wake up from your dream, thief. [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1835983</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>145</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Quality Persona Fics</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>ghost city tokyo</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>[whips] hi so i saw fanart on twitter (can be found <a href="https://twitter.com/Ermina_29/status/1278455575395938304?s=20">here</a> it's absolutely wonderful please look at it) and found <a href="https://twitter.com/Ermina_29/status/1278128495563079680?s=20">this</a> post and uhh hi i'm in shambles and it resulted in this!</p><p>shoutout to my <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/sxnshinenova/pseuds/sxnshinenova">beta</a> who also pointed out that one of the dates i listed was when quarantine started and i'm. yeah no i didn't realize that was an ENITRE coincidence i was just grabbing dates and slapping them down. </p><p>anyway. DO NOT read this if you: a) don't know who the final palace ruler is or b) have zero clue of what happens in the third semester. this is based off the ending where you don't secure the route to the treasure in time. (also, yes, i forgot that the thieves have a meeting about not securing a route in time but i remembered after i finished this and i was not about to rewrite the intro)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Radio silence.</p><p>Absolute <em> radio silence</em>.</p><p>He hasn’t heard from Joker since their last meeting on the 2nd—which, you know, wouldn’t be <em> that concerning </em> if it weren’t for the whole “Maruki gave us until the 3rd to steal his treasure and if we don’t we’ll be trapped in this false reality forever” deal.</p><p>He checks his phone again, making a small, displeased noise under his breath as he stares at empty chatlogs and notes the date.</p><p>
  <em> February 17th, 2017. </em>
</p><p>His eye twitches as he stares down at the messages he’d sent Akira, hoping and waiting for <em> some </em> response. But it’s been two weeks with no answer, and-</p><p>No. <em> No</em>. He wouldn’t cave so easily. He knew- <em> knows </em> Akira wouldn’t cave. He was the one damned person in the entirity of Tokyo that wouldn’t fall for Maruki’s stupid reality.</p><p>Surely something…</p><p>Goro scowls, glaring down at his shoes as he shoves his phone back into his coat pocket.</p><p>He’s overreacting, surely. <em> Surely </em>.</p><p>Kurusu Akira is a stubborn-headed idiot. Goro hadn’t- <em> hasn’t </em> lost him yet. </p><p><em> It hurts, wondering if Akira had just </em> <b> <em>left him</em> </b> <em> out of the fight against Maruki, but no… no, that wouldn’t have happened. He’s still here. They hadn’t secured a route to the treasure by Maruki’s deadline—was Akira just hiding from him? </em> <b> <em>Avoiding</em> </b> <em> him like a </em> <b> <em>coward</em></b><em>? </em></p><p>(goro knows he has no place in calling akira a coward; he’d never told the other what would happen after they went back to their <em> original </em> reality. he’d pretended, at first, that it was so kurusu akira would focus on the task at hand and not let his brainless sentimentality cloud his judgement like it always did whenever akechi goro was involved. <strike>no, he was just scared, scared of actually telling kurusu the truth and seeing his reaction-</strike>)</p><p>So he… tries, for a while, to settle with that idea. That Kurusu was just avoiding him. It wouldn’t make sense, honestly, but it’s the only thing he can think of. <strike>he can think of more theories, worried that akira had accepted the reality, but no, he wouldn’t have, he <em> wouldn’t betray goro like that</em>-</strike></p><p>(but he’d deserve being betrayed like this, seeing as he’d done the same in november.)</p><p>Time passes by. The last dregs of winter make way for the new beginnings of spring, and Goro has the sinking suspicion that the other Thieves have forgotten—in all entirety—about their impulsive, idiotic, <em> self-sacrificing </em>leader.</p><p>He tries to confirm this theory, once. He can barely stand Sakamoto, but he was the closest to Akira out of everyone else, so he’d be the safest to ask, right?</p><p>But he turns up empty-handed, stuck with a confused second-year asking if he’d bumped his head or something. </p><p>“I mean, yeah, it sounds familiar an’ all, but I don’t know anyone with that name?” Sakamoto had said, crossing his arms.</p><p>Goro had (tried to) politefully thank Sakamoto, and turned around and walked as quickly as he could back to his apartment.</p><p>He makes one last-ditch attempt, showing up at LeBlanc one day after school. He tries asking the Sakuras what they remember about Kurusu Akira, the delinquent who <em> lives</em> (lived?) <em>in LeBlanc’s attic</em>, but they both stared at him like he was nuts.</p><p>“Sounds like some sort of NPC in an anime or video game,” the younger had commented, while her father simply stared at Goro and said that he would <em> know </em> if someone was living in the attic.</p><p>He checks his chatlogs once more, a sinking feeling settling in his stomach as he sends off yet another unread message to Akira. (this time, asking incredibly unpolitefully what the <em> fuck </em> was going on.)</p><p>He’s finding himself angry—and rightfully so, he’d argue. He’d tried, once, to find Maruki’s Palace in Odaiba to find the man and demand answers for himself, but the MetaNav came up blank when he’d tried to warp there.</p><p>The date on his phone reads an innocent <em> March 13th, 2017</em>, and he has to bite his gloved hand to keep himself from screaming.</p><p>He has absolutely no idea what day Kurusu would have originally left to go back to his hometown—he <em> was </em> stuck in Tokyo due to his probation and all—but…</p><p>He wouldn’t just… <em> not </em> answer, would he? All of his messages had been stuck somewhere in a limbo between ‘delivered,’ ‘sent,’ and the occasional message that said the number was currently ‘out of service/unavailable.’</p><p>(looking back on it, goro finds it a little strange how quickly (or how eager, more like) akira would always respond to his messages.)</p><p>
  <em> He remembers that night in the jazz club, where the two had spoken about the false reality they were tangled in. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He isn’t sure what ushers him to say it, but the words come spilling out of his mouth in a harsh tone before he can stop himself. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “If you’d lost it too…” he starts, narrowing his eyes as he meets Akira’s gaze. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Well, if that happened, I would have slapped you awake.” </em>
</p><p>He thinks Akira’s response to that was… what? Mildly surprised? Amused? Happy? <em> Relieved </em> to think that Goro cared about him like that? (no, that last one’s probably too out there—he’d just be frustrated if his rival was stuck in a dreamlike trance, unable to face the world like he was supposed to. that was it; nothing more and nothing less.)</p><p>He has a moment where he nearly calls Maruki. Nearly calls the man who shoved everyone in this fake, twisted reality, just so he could try and see if Akira ignoring him was something <em> he </em> had done, or if the teen was just avoiding him.</p><p>(he doesn’t know which situation he’d rather it be.)</p><p>He does see the other Phantom Thieves in their falsified lives, living without a <em> care </em> in the world. They’d all forgotten Kurusu, the face of the Phantom Thieves, their leader, their <em> confidant </em>, their fucking shoulder to cry on whenever they were sad.</p><p>(he’d never been a huge fan of how the thieves seemed to act like their leader had no problems of his own, but what would he know? akira rarely spoke unless spoken to, and goro had only <em> somewhat </em> seen their dynamic during sae’s palace. it doesn’t help that he wasn’t sure how real everything was during those few weeks, but they had their own plans and he had his.)</p><p>He checks the time on his phone.</p><p><em> Tomorrow</em>, he decides, narrowing his eyes down at the unreceived messages in his and Akira’s chatlog. <em> Tomorrow, I’m finding the truth</em>.</p><p>Akechi Goro refuses to live another second in this false reality.</p>
<hr/><p>The next day, he drops his briefcase off at his apartment immediately after classes end and makes a bee-line for LeBlanc, unable to shake the feeling that something is <em> wrong</em>.</p><p>The trains feel like they take years to come and go, and Goro forces himself to ignore the chattering buzz in the stations. He still hears the occasional complaint, of someone mentioning a problem they run into, and he can’t help but feel a sickening moment of amusement and satisfaction upon hearing that.</p><p><em> See that, Maruki? </em> He quietly taunts, shouting up to the man who claims himself a god. <em> Your perfect reality isn’t doing </em> <b> <em>shit</em></b><em>. </em></p><p>The moment he steps off the Yongen-Jaya station, he walks as quickly as possible down a path he’s walked dozens of times before.</p><p>(but this time, it’s not for a meeting or to keep a curious eye on the person he suspects to be the phantom thieves’ leader. no, instead, this time it’s to figure out what the hell is going on, to figure out why akira hasn’t been responding.)</p><p>He wonders, just briefly as the cafe enters his vision, what would happen if he wound up overreacting to some massive, <em> shitty </em> prank pulled by everyone he knows.</p><p>He barely spares Sojiro a second glance as he shoots past the man, ignoring his startled question of <em> What the hell are you </em> <b> <em>doing</em></b><em>, kid? </em> and ignores Futaba and her mother’s confused glances in his general direction (just avoids <em> looking at Wakaba Isshiki in general, she should be dead, he’d killed her with his own two hands in Mementos when he was fifteen</em>-).</p><p>“Joker, where are you,” he mutters darkly, stepping out into the attic proper, only for his eyes to widen in horrendous disbelief as he stares at the teen, wrapped in a cocoon of his comforter, surrounding by cobwebs that look older and seem like they’ve been there longer than just shy over a month, and-</p><p>“Are you <em> serious</em>…?” he hisses, fists clenching as he stares at the teen who used to be so full of <em> life </em>, of spite and pettiness and the general air of cockiness and awkwardness, who now just emptily stares at a blank screen on a potentially dead phone. He ignores the sting in his heart (ignores how his vision immediately clouds).</p><p>He darts over to the bed, grabs Kurusu Akira by the shoulders, and slams the teen’s shoulders into the crates holding up his shitty futon. He has a knee on each side of the teen and his shoulders <em> shake</em>, raising a hand to slap him. </p><p>It resounds, loud and clear, in the otherwise empty and silent attic. (he wonders what the three downstairs are thinking, or does he not exist to them anymore? did coming up into the attic break some sort of trance? were those three even <em> aware </em> that akira was up here?)</p><p>He chokes on a breath, hair falling out of place and hanging, nearly curtaining both his and Akira’s faces. “<em>Wake up</em>!” he shouts, forehead nearly touching Akira’s. He does his best to stare at the teen as he says this, trying to glare dead into his soul to try and register <em> some </em> emotion, some flicker of recognition, but there’s <em> nothing </em>.</p><p>Instead, when he stares into Kurusu Akira’s eyes, he’s met with a dull and lifeless gray, reflecting Goro’s pure, unadultrified <em> desperation</em>. </p><p>Goro chokes on a sob, forcing himself to close his eyes. He- </p><p>“Wake up,” he hisses, weakly, tiredly, forcing himself to stay propped upright by his elbows and knees. “Wake <em> up</em>!” he shouts once more, snapping his eyes open and feeling tears stinging at his vision. </p><p>Below him, the leader of the Phantom Thieves just stares at him blankly, lifelessly.</p><p>Goro feels as if his entire life has been ripped away from him. But he can’t- he <em> swore</em>-</p><p>“Your idiot <em> Thieves </em> have all forgotten about you,” he chokes out, trying to maintain <em> some </em> sort of composure—but he’s quickly questioning the use of it, considering that the only person in this entire damned country that he <em> cares about </em> is currently-</p><p>How… <em> would </em> he describe this? He’s just… asleep. Stuck. Trapped in a place between waking and sleep, looking like he’s completely out of it, staring straight past Goro. It’d send chills down his spine if he wasn’t so emotionally <em> wrecked </em> about this whole situation.</p><p>“You <em> idiot</em>,” he hisses, arms and neck beginning to prick uncomfortably.</p><p>He hovers there, just for a moment longer, letting the silence stretch between them as he hopes, <em> prays </em> amidst his seething anger, that Kurusu Akira will <em> wake up </em> and say something.</p><p>“Did you know?” he finally whispers, resting his forehead against Akira’s. “Is <em> that </em> why? Or did you not realize, and just wanted the best for your friends who would forget you?” His hands clench, digging into the uncomfortable material of the futon, brushing against the empty crates.</p><p>He can imagine Akira’s response to that: <em> As long as they’re happy, I don’t care</em>. He’d say it as if he whole-heartedly meant it, but Goro has the suspicion that Akira would care more than he’d ever let on.</p><p>“You self-sacrificial <em> idiot</em>.” He takes a deep breath, moving one of his hands to clench at the fabric of Akira’s shirt. “What happened to the idiotic leader of the Phantom Thieves who never backed down from a challenge? Any self-sufficient <em> rival </em> of mine would be <em> better than this</em>,” Goro hisses out, wishing, <em> praying</em>, for some reaction in Akira’s eyes.</p><p>Nothing. Always, <em> always </em> nothing.</p><p>“You’re ridiculous to never <em> give up on me or your teammates</em>, but you just- give up because you can’t <em> make a decision</em>?!”</p><p>He shakes his head, frustration and anger rolling off him in waves. “You’re the one who promised to give me that rematch, Kurusu, so <em> wake the fuck up</em>!” He shakes Akira as he says this, teeth clenched and fingers clenching tight into the soft fabric of the black shirt.</p><p>He keeps coming up empty and he realizes that talking things out isn’t going to work.</p><p>He finally repositions himself, so that he’s not awkwardly hovering over Akira. He sits on the teen’s thighs and hangs his head, narrowing his eyes as he glares down into Akira’s lifeless ones. “I once told you that I’d slap you awake if I had to,” he growls, grabbing the thief’s shoulders. His lifeless eyes widen briefly (from surprise?) and Goro glares into Akira’s eyes, releasing one of his shoulders so that his left hand is free. He shakes his hand out once, twice, and smacks Akira as hard as he can across the face.</p><p>Something in Akira’s eyes flickers, but nothing else happens. Goro makes an annoyed noise under his breath and backhands Akira, trying to find <em> some </em> reaction in the teen. There had to be <em> something</em>.</p><p>He’s not looking the next time he moves to slap Akira again, ready to continuously hit him as many times as he needed before the idiot <em> woke up</em>, but something catches his arm.</p><p>Goro blinks in surprise, eyes wide as his gaze shifts quickly between his wrist (which is currently crying out in discomfort from an uncomfortable hold) and-</p><p>“You’re-”</p><p>“That <em> hurt</em>,” comes the quiet, weak grumble of Kurusu Akira, who’s now staring at Goro under tired, half-lidded eyes. </p><p>Goro swallows thickly, staring with wide eyes at Akira, and absolutely <em> does not </em> fucking cry. He completely ignores the tears beginning to sting at his eyes and only awkwardly stares down at Akira in a mixture of shock and-</p><p>“Ake-” Akira cuts himself off with a small, forced exhale, narrowing his eyes and blinking rapidly as he tries to place himself. “What-”</p><p>“You failed to make a decision, I presume,” Goro responds coolly, calmly, <em> collectedly </em> (and he won’t respond to anyone who tries to prove <em> differently </em> because what the hell would they know). His voice darkens and he leans back slightly, letting his right hand fall from Akira’s shoulder.</p><p>(he doesn’t fight the awkward grip that keeps his other hand still.)</p><p>“I…” Akira trails off, eyes falling somewhere else, unwilling to meet Goro’s gaze. Which is fine, frankly, because for all Goro wants to angrily glare down at his rival, he can’t seem to hold his gaze.</p><p>Akira shifts slightly, now sitting more upright. He’s still holding onto Goro’s wrist, but it’s more relaxed now and their hands are resting on the futon. </p><p>“Why didn’t you…”</p><p>He can’t see it, but he can <em> feel </em> the guilt radiating off Akira. “You all deserved better,” he finally says, shoulders rising and falling as he sighs.</p><p>Goro shifts uncomfortably (ignoring how he’s practically sitting in Akira’s lap at this point), forcing himself to meet Akira’s gaze. “Did you know?” he asks darkly, trying to gauge a reaction. When Akira tries to shrink in on himself, clearly unwilling to meet Goro’s gaze, he presses harder. “Did you <em> know</em>.”</p><p>Akira flinches at this and finally caves. “I… had my suspicions,” he finally admits softly, completely unwilling to meet Goro’s gaze <em> still</em>. “I couldn’t-”</p><p>“Kurusu, my life is <em> trivial </em> compared to-”</p><p>“It’s not trivial!” he finally snaps, head snapping up to angrily glare at Goro and- holy shit, is he- “Your life isn’t <em> trivial,</em> Akechi!”</p><p>“Yes it <em> is</em>!” Gods, are they <em> really </em> fighting over something as stupid as this? He opens his mouth, about to say something, probably some <em> witty retort </em> about how his life wouldn’t matter if it got everyone <em> out of this infernal false reality</em>, but finds himself shocked into silence.</p><p>He stares down at Akira, practically <em> radiating </em> shock. The teen had lunged upward, grabbing fistfulls of Goro’s stupid winter uniform jacket and buries his head in the junction between his neck and shoulder. Something wet brushes against the bare skin of his neck and his mind blanks.</p><p>Goro can only sit there in shock and blink, hands hovering behind Akira’s back, unsure what to do with them, or what to do in general.</p><p>“Look…” he finally murmurs, unmoving. He feels Akira blink against his skin, eyelashes fluttering against his neck. “I’m tired of my life being controlled by someone else,” Goro says, voice hardening. “I’m <em> sick </em> of being a puppet in someone else’s games, of being <em> controlled </em> by someone else. You understand that, don’t you?”</p><p>Akira doesn’t verbally respond for a while, his only response to hold tighter onto Goro, who sighs. Eventually he finds himself caving, resting his chin on Akira’s shoulder and holding the younger teen tightly against him.</p><p>“Please tell me you understand,” he says quietly, voice barely a murmur and as soft as he can possibly make it without slipping into one of his old masks.</p><p>The only response Goro gets comes in the form of Akira’s hands gripping impossibly tighter onto his jacket.</p><p>Eventually, Goro sighs. “I’m gonna kill him,” he mumbles, and blinks in surprise when Akira moves. (okay, more correctly, it’s just him repositioning his head so that his speech wouldn’t be muffled in goro’s shoulder, but…)</p><p>“Please don’t,” he says quietly, shoulders tensing. “That’s not… how we do things.”</p><p>“By all technicalities, I’m not technically ‘one of you’, am I?” Goro hums, unaware of his thumb rubbing small circles on Akira’s back.</p><p>Akira huffs a tired sigh. The two sit there in silence for a while, neither sure how to break the silence nor how to bring back the subject at hand.</p><p>The silence finally shifts as Akira yawns, pressing further into Goro’s neck. “‘m tired,” he murmurs, clearly <em> sounding </em> the part, but Goro immediately refuses.</p><p>“You are <em> not </em> going back to sleep,” he snaps. “God knows how long you’ve been sleeping for up here, and I’m not-” His breath catches and he grunts, narrowing his eyes. “I’m not…”</p><p>“Aw,” Akira teases, finally releasing Goro. He leans back far enough so that he can meet Goro’s gaze, and reaches out with his hand, extending a finger and- <em> what </em>. “You do care about me.”</p><p>“Shut up,” he grumbles, turning away to try and- what? Hide his flustered reaction? Of <em> course </em> he’d be flustered, Akira just <em> booped </em> him on the nose like he was some sort of <em> cat</em>. (and he was also unwilling to admit that, yes, maybe he <em> did </em> care.)</p><p>He stares off somewhere near the shelves, eying the dusty cobwebs covering the knick-knack collection Akira had managed to amass during his time spent in Tokyo.</p><p>“Promise me,” he finally says, turning back to face Akira. He moves his hands, grabbing Akira’s arms and presses his thumbs into his arms, narrowing his eyes when the other looks like he might doze off again. “Akira- <em> stay awake</em>.” The teen in question sighs in response, but forces himself to meet Goro’s gaze. “Promise me that we’ll take Maruki down,” he says, tightening his grip on Akira’s arms.</p><p>Akira stares at him, eyes full of- what? Sadness? Pity? <em> Grow up, Kurusu, </em> he wants to say. <em> I was never yours to begin with. Let me die. Let me </em> <b> <em>go</em></b>. But he holds his tongue, watching carefully to see what the other might say, praying that he agrees.</p><p>“It’s…” Akira heaves a sigh, and Goro can tell he’s forcing himself to keep himself steady, forcing himself to hold eye contact. “Fine. It’s a deal.”</p><p>Goro sighs in relief, resting his forehead against Akira’s.</p><p>“Thank you."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>失うことに慣れていく中で <em>(Even as I grow used to losing)</em><br/>
失くさずにいた大事な想いを <em>(These important feelings that I haven't lost -)</em><br/>
抱き締めたら不意に <em>(When I held them close to myself,)</em><br/>
涙が落ちたのは<em> (my tears fell suddenly)</em><br/>
この街でまだ <em>(Because I think I still want to)</em><br/>
生きていたいと思うから <em>(Keep living in this city)</em></p><p>君もそうでしょ <em>(I bet it’s the same for you)</em></p><p>song in title: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyDN4R0pWvM">ghost city tokyo</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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